Photo of The Day: The 'Nyansh' That Drugs Built [Viewer discretion is advised]

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Thursday, June 05, 2014

If you watch music videos you've seen 'em. If you know Nicki Minaj has curves, you know 'em, if you've wondered how on earth they come to look like that, you've been thought provoked by them. They are the fake assets constructed to mesmerize and taunt; they are not God given but man-made.

They are the 'Nyanshes' that drugs built - artificial bumbums, baroof bakassi, synthetic buttocks....Many amongst men have been decieved by them but one thing I know is that 'if it is not panadol, it is not the same thing as panadol!'  What happens when the nyansh that drugs are building goes wrong? the answer is the photo below.

May it not be the portion of any woman oh! Please stay close to your natural body. There will always be somebody who is crazy about it. Not all that glitters is gold and not all that is inflated by injections remain naturally firm. The picture above is that of a butt injection gone wrong.

Have a nice day!

The Big Butt Equals Big Brains Theory - How True?

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Friday, November 08, 2013

There's this bit of news that has been circulating which is bound to bring a smile to the faces of women with a big behinds - the news of a discovery that women with big butts are healthier and smarter. I came across the info on fellow blogger Verastic's recent post and it got me into deep thought because I am very involved in this matter - by that I mean my woman has a big 'nyansh'. 

I used to marvel at big butts and think they were a sexy joke played by nature on women. But after being in a few relationships with carriers of this 'derriere de magnificent' and eventually getting married to one, I am sort of thinking that what this research says may have some truth in it.  

But then we shouldn't get it twisted because a lot of people will get deceived by manipulation of this info and the facts of life on ground. 

If a big behind makes a woman smarter, then we should be wary of women with fake behinds; I'm not talking of people wearing butt-pads alone but the ones that get butt implants (I wrote a post on this in July last year). This category of ladies unfortunately are like a paradox to what this research says. Their decision to get big 'nyansh' is not motivated by smart thinking but a feeling of insecurity and complex. Also, its not a healthy thing to do; rather than be smarter and healthier, you are making a stupid decision and endangering your health.

Vanity Wonder, a dancer who spent $15,000 on black-market butt injections
that nearly killed her,is dedicating her life to saving others from the same fate.

This is one issue that some blogs that carried this 'big butt, smart chick' news are missing out. One blog had a post earlier this year that had the headline - Why Big Booty is Good for Women which I know would mislead a lot of ladies who are obsessed with getting artificial butts. How can you mess with nature and expect your body to stay okay? There's always dire repercussion for such things.  

According to a report from the Latin Post:

Those with inflated derrières have lower insulin resistance, and they produce hormones that better metabolize sugar — which means these women are less likely to develop heart problems or diabetes than women who carry extra weight around their stomachs. These women also tend to have lower cholesterol; and they tend be smarter, because they produce more Omega 3 fats, which mobilizes brain development.

Researchers indicate that fat in the lower body is preferred to fat anywhere else throughout the body. Dr. Michael Jensen, director of endocrine research at the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minn. stated that the fat of pear-shaped women behaves in healthy ways, and that the public should think about fat “as an important organ for our health.”

“It is the protective role of lower body, that is [thigh and backside] fat, that is striking. The protective properties of the lower body fat depot have been confirmed in many studies conducted in subjects with a wide range of age, BMI and co-morbidities,” ABC News said, quoting the Journal of Obesity.

Dr. Robert Kushners, medical specialist in obesity at Northwestern Memorial Hospital, clarified that fat in the stomach is “more metabolically active,” therefore harmful, while fat in the lower regions may be more stable.

Kim, Lopez, Toolz and Omotola

Okay. Let's do a small roll-call of popular women with big butts and find out if they are really smart.

Can we then say that that Jennifer Lopez is smarter and healthier? Maybe she is with the way she delved from music into movies and also established her own business of perfumes amongst others.

What about Kim Kardashian? - Unless she had 'nyansh' implants then I'm not buying the theory. Apart from having a baby, I'm still yet to discover any smart thing she has done.

Big bottomed Tolu Oniru aka Toolz of Beat FM is no doubt a smart woman 'cause it shows in her personality and the way she handles matters on air.

Omotola Jalade has also proven beyond doubt on a grand scale that bigger butt equals bigger brain with her all her achievements.

These are just a few out of a number of celebrities who are 'nyansh' representing. 

Verastic on her blog made it obvious she's richly endowed with a big butt and judging from the photo below, its obvious. So is she a smart chick? After watching and reading her blog which has ran for over seven years, seeing her faithfully run radio shows on blogtalk radio, I can't deny her obvious smartness. 

All those video vixens in music videos flaunting their behinds nko? Let's not be deceived; there's a lot of fake butt (implants) as mentioned earlier to ply the trade. 

I have met women with big butts that are really smart - like my woman and some of her friends, three of my female colleagues in the office, a family friend etc.

I've also come across women with gracious butts that have been seriously stupid with their choices in life and fail to exhibit any form of smartness.

Is it that the smartness is there but they are refusing to manifest it?

Does this 'big butt equals big brains' theory really hold water?

The only conclusion I can give is that any woman with big butt who is not smart or healthy, something is wrong somewhere.

Abi?

What You Probably Never Knew About Condoms

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Wednesday, August 07, 2013

Condoms are probably the most popular contraceptives but how much do we know about this famous (and infamous) latex?
                                    

                                   

Source

LOL...Have you learnt anything? Hope you have!

                                   

                                   

                                   

                       

How to Stop That Annoying Itch of a Mosquito Bite

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Tuesday, July 02, 2013

Besides the fear of getting infected with a malaria parasite, the other annoying aspect of a mosquito is the itchiness of its bite. When this happens, one is usually forced to scratch the living daylights out of the itch till it peels and becomes a sore.

Well some smart alec seems to have found a solution on a Reddit post where the info states that by putting a hot spoon on the itchy area, you destroy the protein responsible for the allergic reaction. This was confirmed by other commenters on the topic. One of them further states that this is true for most itchy allergic reactions. He states a case where he had to soak a cloth in hot water to press against an itchy eye from an allergic reaction.

Surprisingly I happen to have accidentally tried this and it worked - I happened to have this itch and I pressed it against a mug of hot beverage and it ceased. I can now officially see it as a remedy.





Image courtesy
www.how-to-draw-funny-cartoons.com

'Food Poisoning' Hooks Madam Patience - For Real?

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, September 03, 2012

Source

This is not the first time a first lady has to be flown abroad for treatment. I just hope it is not for another tummy tuck operation like Stella Obasanjo’s tragic case.

I know they said they flew her for treatment against food poisoning but I find it hard to believe that.

Seriously, what manner of food poisoning is that bad that requires being flown to Germany for treatment?

Me thinks there’s something somebody is not telling us.

Na food poisoning we no fit remedy for Naija? Are our medical facilities that bad?

This our first lady get plenty controversy surrounding her sha…first na her grammar, then na her crazy combination of positions as Perm Sec and First Lady. Now it is flying abroad because food wey she chop fall her hand…

The 'Nyansh' That Drugs Built

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, July 02, 2012

I sat one day in our living room and looked at my wife as my mind torpedoed down memory lane. I remembered when I first met her; she was this smallish slim ever-smiling-girl-next-door IT student attached to the Audio/Visual unit in my workplace.

She did not in the least bit strike me as someone I could get interested in back then as I was already trying to get the attention of another lady...until circumstance threw us together.

Fast forward to present day.

Wifey no longer looks smallish.

She has become this voluptuous damsel with sweet mischievous eyes. Her breasts that used to be funny-looking ‘agbalumo’ size back then had become attractive looking ‘pawpaw’ size today. My favourite is her buttocks – they have become a pair of daredevils that send me into a senseless state when she walks about the room in panties or thongs; they are far bigger and better than what they were in those days! I’m so proud of my matrimonial ASSets…

I have come to understand that while it seems puberty is the major stage where changes happen in humans, it particularly does not stop there for women. Women keep undergoing changes even in their mid to late twenties.

I’ve seen girls in my workplace who have changed over time from when they first joined the company; I saw it in my younger sister before she got married, I saw it again after she got married. It never seems to stop.

My lesson from this is that I should always let nature take its course and things will work out for the better.

The good thing is, the change can go on for the better; like it did to my wife. And it’s natural.

I just simply believe anybody can look GOOD without enhancing their breasts or injecting their hips and butt!

Looking good and investing to look good is not a bad thing. But when you begin to take it to the extreme, I feel it’s a problem.

Today we have many accessories that help enhance our looks – styled clothes, shoes, sunshades, wristwatches, jewelry, hand bands, etc. But then we have the ones taken to the extreme which have become trends; plastic surgery for uplifts of facial parts, breast enhancements, multiple piercing in unimaginable places, tattoos…the list is almost endless.

I’ve always wondered what would make a woman go through all manner of extreme body enhancements just to look good. Is it poor self esteem? Abi na peer pressure?

While I’ve never been able to come to terms with why women want breast enlargement or reduction, I’m way more baffled with the act of injecting one’s ass and hips with enhancement drugs to generate a bigger butt and hips.

I also learnt that injecting these drugs can also kill the recipient. News of such tragedies like that of Claudia Aderotimi, are rife over the internet. Also people who once indulged in it are making it clear that it’s not a good idea.

Claudia Aderotimi

Is such venture worth risking your life for?

Even if research scientists claim that a big butt can save you from diabetes, I don’t think they meant an artificially grown one!

I never knew this thing was real till I came upon information about it. I now know that majority of those risqué pictures of women with unnaturally massive behinds scattered around the internet were not photo-shopped and that a high percentage of those video vixens in dirty rap videos are artificially enhanced.

Artificiality today has become a way of life. It seems and sounds like a trend but I think it has the potential of degenerating into an abomination, especially when it goes to the extreme. I believe most of the times it is powered by low self esteem. After reading Claudia’s story, I could only conclude that this was the case.

In this age of instant fixes, people seem to want everything quickly; it’s a fast food mentality approach to everything. Wanting an instant bigger butt, is no exception.

Unfortunately, nature has a way of getting back at you when you mess with it, ‘cause no matter how much artificial fiasco we put up, we can never duplicate.  

Wear at Your Own Risk

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, May 14, 2012

 

They are intimidating.

They make women look like elegant vixens.

They add sex appeal and sometimes amusing gait to the woman’s walk.

They call them high heels.

I call them ‘Weapons of Feet Destruction’.

Now I’d like to make a distinction between moderately balanced or wedge heels and the monstrous ones that seem to be in vogue. The moderately balanced heels and wedge heels happen to be in the sane category; they are sometimes not too high and are always comfortable and safer for women to wear. They don’t put women through the calculated torture of taking extra-conscious steps.  The high heels and sometimes stiletto heels on the other hand, are the insane category that have made women switch to the ‘sufferin’ and smilin’ mode by force. I’m not even sure if I can say it’s a new trend because high heels have always been there. It just seems that shoe designers have decided to torture women further by making the heels taller and shoes curvier. 

People will call it fashion but I call it gross inhumanity to womanhood. It’s amazing how no one seems to actually realize that these extra high ‘monsters’ do more harm than good to you. All over the internet, you get to see pictures or videos of women falling due to ‘waka miscalculation’ on those nasty twosomes; that apart from the nasty aftereffects of wearing too much of it .

The price people pay to look good!

A lot of the ladies in my office are fond of wearing these monstrous heels and they do a good job of showing off in them. In fact we created a name for these chicks who love to wear these abominations (sorry if that term hurt, but truth is bitter!), we call them the ‘Office Kardashians’ – I’m not a fan of any Kardashian reality show but I’ve had a glimpse at some episodes and by this term I can understand what on earth it means.

These shoes are basically hazardous to its wearers but I guess since it’s not hazardous to their self esteem, and people prefer to ignore the former. Just last month, a lady in my office tripped on the stairs as she miscalculated her stepping in one of these abominations. She fell and sprained her ankle. For the next few weeks she had to be wearing flat heels and balm due to the pain. Thank goodness it healed before her upcoming wedding day; she would have limped to the altar.

Another lady fell just outside our office and ended up carrying a bandage on her right leg for weeks.

Then a few days ago another lady miscalculated and fell on the stairs again. She had to be taken to the hospital because she sustained injuries; one of her fingernails was uprooted and she had bad scrapes on her fine spotless legs.

Our office stairs
(where the ladies fell)

Our office floors

Another stairscase at our office
('Office Kardashians' descend this stairs everyday)

Looking at our office’s marble floors, tiles and stairs(pictured above), you’ll know they are not ‘extreme high heels friendly'. So every high heeled damsel tread at their own risk. Meanwhile the moderate heeled ones move more easily.

Then just a few days back on my way to the Bank, I passed by a private school where parents or drivers where arriving to pick their kids and there was this lady in obscene high heels trying to keep her balance on the rugged ground as she made her way through the school gates. People, especially mothers were watching her and laughing at her dilemma. I think her self esteem must have instantly plummeted.

And if what I’m saying is not enough, check out the numerous online videos like this one where these extreme heels have embarrassed theirwearers.

One of the viewers of this video made a comment that raises a good question:

‘If i ever become a fashion designer I’m going to make shoes that women can actually f**g walk in......’

Are these shoes made for walking at all? I know some ladies will say the shoes should only be worn at an occasion but not worn to walk around all day. The fact still remains that the designers of these shoes are definitely heartless; the manner in which their artsy and supposedly ‘trendy’ shoes have messed up the womenfolk is alarming.

All fall down yakata!

Click on this link to see more damage causedby these orthopedic abominations.

Wifey had a couple of these monsters but she hardly wore them. Eventually she gave them out wondering how on earth other women survived in them. She stuck to her moderate or wedge heels which still brings out her sweet appeal and that's fine by me!



Additional Images Courtesy:
www.sansscience.wordpress.com
www.uggukblog.com

By their smells you shall know them…

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Tuesday, July 06, 2010

It’s amazing how the smell or scent coming from a person can create a strong perception of that person. It doesn’t matter where it’s emanating from. As long as you can perceive a certain smell when the person happens to pass by, it can end up shaping your thoughts or opinions towards him or her.

But then I’d like to categorize smells. There are two divisions; the scent and the stink.

Simply put, the scent is the pleasant one while the stink is the disgusting or unpleasant one. And when I think of it, I now understand the important role perfumes and deodorants play in our lives.

When a good perfume or deodorant hits your nose coming from a person, there’s this kind of high regard for the person, especially if it’s someone you’re meeting for the first time or someone who is always wearing perfumes in your office. Your regard may be that of respect for the person’s choice of scent, class of choice, or the person’s realization of the need to smell good.

But just as a good scent can create a good perception, a serious stink can kill it; especially if the person is what I call a ‘smell paradox.’


I’ve come across ‘smell paradoxes’ and it was a disheartening experience because the persons in questions had the good works – looks, poise, dress sense and all.

And what’s the smell paradox? Having a scent and a stink at the same time!

They wore a nice perfume or deodorant but forgot to take care of their breath, reeking feet, etc. Sometimes it’s not deliberate. I have female friends who love to eat good stuff (you know how some ladies can be sweet tooths with all the craving for chocolate and sweet junk) but they fail to realize that after eating these things, sediments get stuck in their mouths and in a short while begins to smell badly. Thus the lady comes around you and you sniff her scent with pleasure but when she opens her mouth to speak, you hold your breath in hidden disgust!

Don’t get me wrong, guys are not excluded in this case. They are most times guilty of the stink.

These are the accidental stinks. Then there are the permanent ones which range from bad body odour to halitosis. Permit me not to go there as long as there are prescribed remedies to right those.


I think it makes sense if one tries to control his smells and ensure they don’t go out of control – like a brother-in-law of mine whom I always chastise to stop wearing the same boxers for more than a day because he generates a stink in them that can make your skin cringe. Or taking time to drink enough water or rinse your mouth properly (with water and not soft drink!) after consuming a heavy meal of ‘fufu’ and ‘ogbono’ soup or wolfing down a box of chocolates or exotic snacks. And what about the individual that sweats a lot? Be sure to control your hygiene or you end up smelling like ‘stale palm wine’ or something rotten.



I remember back in the University when I was in my second year. I was in my room with my roommates when there was a knock on the door. We responded and two ladies came in to preach the gospel of salvation to us. They would have made so much sense that day if not for the stink. I didn’t identify it on time since different smells were in the air till they left and one of my roomies raised the issue.



‘Guys…did you notice the smell when those ladies came here?’



We acknowledged that there had been a smell. He dropped the bomb.



‘That my friends…was the smell of p***y!’



We were shocked and all manner of speculations started flying as my roomies began to suggest maybe the lady who brought the stink was dirty, or had just had sex before coming to preach. To cut the story short, we ended up discussing about stinking private parts and hygiene rather than the message brought before us.



I guess a stink can do a lot of damage.



There was a time we had a pretty lady join our office as contract staff. She came all the way from the USA and was foreign accented such that the only way you could know she was Nigerian was by her name. She was a classy dresser, used nice jewelry and perfume – good scent which made me have a high perception of her as a person…until the day I was about to use the toilet and she stepped out after use. I stepped in and ran out again, almost choking.



Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying fine chicks no dey shit. This was just a case of accidental stink and to make matters worse, her ‘load’ smeared the inside of the water closet. I wonder how she perched to achieve that.

Other chicks in the office use the toilet but many of them leave behind a fragrance that makes you worry less that a shit episode just took place there. Maybe they take their perfumes with them and apply and freshen up after doing the business. I don’t know how they do it. But Missy here didn’t. She left the place stinking to high heavens.

And as for the men, forget them. They’ll mess up toilets with gas and crap anytime, any day.

I try not to leave a bad impression when I do the doodoo. I carry my own handwash and an air freshener spray if I have one. If I don’t, I reserve the business till the end of the day – except it’s a serious emergency.



Better to leave a scent behind than a stink. Trust me…first impression may last long, but a stink impression lasts longer.

The Critters beneath your sheets

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, August 10, 2009

I’ll never forget one cool breezy night on campus, I couldn’t get into my room in one of the halls of residence because a roommate had accidentally made off to an overnight outing with the room key leaving me without a place to lay my head for the night. I hated the idea of asking guys in neighboring rooms to let me crash with them so I decided to go sleep on one of the big sofas in one of the lounges. 

The lounge had many sofas lined up for students who wanted to chill out and watch the TV or just hand around. I picked a neat one, dusted it with my hankie and lay down to savour the sweetness of sleep beckoning to me.

I woke up quite earlier than I usually would…then my body began to itch. I scratched and scratched. Then I noticed the small swellings all over my body. They didn’t look like mosquito bites. I knew they weren’t. And besides, there were no mosquitoes in the lounge. I looked at where I slept. There seemed to be nothing crawling on the sofa. Then where on earth did these bites come from?

Later I checked up on them and discovered they were everyone’s nightmare when you least expect.

You hardly get to see them but they are there, lurking in the great chasm that serves as the final resting place for your weary head after a hard days work or when you just retire for the night.

They come unnoticed and they attack without warning. They turn some skins into bloody spotted designs, others into swollen welts scattered across the surface. 

They make you begin to dread lying on the most comfortable furniture in your home because they seem to love residing deep within anything comfortable. 
And boy, do their bites itch like crazy!

Welcome to the world of those tiny critters known as BED BUGS.

So how do you stop that itching, and get rid of these venomous cretins? Bed bugs can really be a pain in the ass- as tiny as these buggers are, they can make life a nightmare for you.

But thanks to the internet, you can always get info that’ll help. 
I’ll recommend The Bed Bugs guide site. There you’ll get all the info you need to know about You can never tell if these critters have begun breeding in your home. The only way they’ll announce their arrival is after you received a welcome message a bites scattered all over your skinsies. So it really makes a whole lot of sense to be ready to stop them before they decide to camp in your home. 

The Bed Bugs guide site is loaded with all the info you need and also pictures and accounts of how other people dealt with the menace. I’ve taken their tips in handy and I’m keeping clear of those little devils.

The Obese and The Plus Sized

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Wednesday, August 27, 2008

I burst into a fit of rabid laughter.
My mentor had just related something that’s so funny yet seriously shocking.

He said while he was in the US he had never in his life come across such massive and huge human beings as the variety of fat people you have in America. 

Why did he raise this point?
He was talking about trying to meet Naija’s needs. One of such needs is food. If the we can totally solve the problem of hunger in Nigeria then we’ll have fewer cases of poor nutrition and living below the poverty line in terms of feeding. The common man in Nigerian is struggling to put food on the table and feed a family - That’s a need that has to be met across the nation.

In comparism, the US has solved that problem. In fact, the need has been met too much such that it’s become a problem.

The proof? Obese people all over the place!

Aaaarrrghh!!

According to Ron Taylor in his article, Obesity - an American Epidemic:  

An epidemic of obesity and its health related complications are sweeping America.
Unfortunately, one out of three of us are part of this plague, and the number appears to grow daily. 
Despite an abundance of diet books, diet plans, home exercise equipment, and dire warnings from the medical community, less than one percent of dieters achieve sustained weight loss and many fail to produce measurable results in health improvements.
 In fact, research suggests dieting may be part of the obesity problem, rather than the solution.

The root of the obesity problem lies in our eating habits. Simply put, we eat too much saturated fat and refined sugar, and too little fiber-most of this brought on by spending over half of our food budget on fast food in the form of greasy burgers and fries, gulped down with syrup-laden sodas…

Read the rest of the article

Eddie Murphy's 'Femme FATale' in Norbit bares the (Uurrgh!) flesh.

Naija has its own share of fat folks too but there are more cases of massive potbellies in Naija than obese people. Thanks to excessive starchy food consumption and absence of balanced diet. 
I’ve come across some cases where fat people try to justify their being large as a feature that should be appreciated and not ridiculed.

Well, my point would be that there’s a difference between an Obese person and a Plus-sized person. Obese people usually have a record of excessive intake of junk food and had a way they looked before they became how they are.

 Plus sized folks are just naturally big. And you’ll find out that such people can still look ‘flabulous’ because they were made that way.

Monique - plus sized thats big and beautiful

So if you’re naturally plus-sized, then you’re big and can be beautiful. As for being obese, I don’t see anything beautiful in that.

Plus-Sized can still be beautiful 

Obese people should stop comforting themselves by classing themselves among the plus-sized folk, they should get medical help!

Watermelon Does the Same Work As Viagra?

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Wednesday, July 09, 2008

 I guess we are too pre-occupied on junk and artificial food that we've forgotten the natural ones which can actually save our lives from different ailments. Its amazing the things fruits and veggies do for us and yet we take them for granted. I won't be surprised if the cure for terrible diseases such as AIDS comes from a simple neglected and forgotten plant. I came across this interesting piece on Watermelon recently.


A cool, juicy watermelon is a refreshing fruit for many. However, watermelons may have the same effect as Viagra, a drug used to treat erectile dysfunction.



Watermelons have an ingredient called citrulline that could trigger the production of a compound that relaxes the body’s blood vessels, which is also what happens when a man takes Viagra.

Scientists in Texas say that citrulline reacts with the body’s enzymes when consumed in large quantities and is then changed to arginine, an amino acid that benefits the heart and circulatory systems.

"Arginine boosts nitric oxide, which relaxes blood vessels, the same basic effect that Viagra has, to treat erectile dysfunction and maybe even prevent it," said Bhimu Patil, a researcher and director of Texas A&M's Fruit and Vegetable Improvement Center. "Watermelon may not be as organ-specific as Viagra, but it's a great way to relax blood vessels without any drug side effects."

However, some researchers say that anyone taking Viagra shouldn’t expect the same results from watermelon.


Incredible isn't it? Read more about it here

Well, what can I say? It looks unbelievable that a simple watermelon might be Nature's viagra.
Years ago, a Nigerian Doctor claimed he cured AIDS with herbs but the scientific world discredited it on some unclear grounds. Is it because it did not involve chemicals or because an african made such discovery?

I believe its not impossible for the cure to many of our ailments to be found in nature's edibles surrounding us.
Here's a video that showcases some astonishing truths we never knew, no thanks to junk food and all that artificial crap that we fill ourselves with. 



What can I say? Lets eat more of Nature's edibles and stay alive and healthier!

The Gaping Maw

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Tuesday, May 06, 2008

It was like 12 years ago when I paid a visit to the dentist to have one of my molars filled. I had a nasty sweet tooth and was finally getting to 'reap the benefits'of my obsession. I had awoken in the middle of the night groaning in pain, waking up the entire household. My parents had rushed me off to the dentist the moment it was morning and the dentist had resumed at the hospital.


If you've ever been to the dentist to have a screwed up tooth drilled with a small drilling machine in order to clean out the decay and make room for proper filling, you can understand what I mean when I say, it was a nightmare I never wanted to experience again.


As the the dentist drilled my rotten molar, I screamed in horror as unspeakable pain ricochetted through my entire body. Mum held me and assured me it was gonna be alrite.

I was like WT?? Alrite? This dude is drilling me to death!



As the drill bit deeper into my molar, I percieved the smell of granite, it was the smell of hot friction against my tooth as it chipped away under the intensity of the dental drill. I screamed like a banshee, the nurse and my Mum held me down tight. I sweated profusely like a condemed criminal. I thought I was gonna die.

Eventually the dentist stopped drilling, got me to rinse my mouth and proceeded to fill up the gap in my tooth. I promised myself I'd never get into a dentist chair again.

Wrong!!

12 years later the same tooth started acting up. I was like 'aw hell no!' But hell yeah I needed to go get my choppers checked.

The dentist was a nice middle aged lady. I thought because she was nice I would have it easy on my dentals. She examined me and discovered the tooth had cracked and some it had broken off (Now I know why I thought there was stone in my rice!). She did a temporary fill, then instructed me to come back in a few weeks but if it begun to pain me I should come down immediately.

A week passed. Two weeks, then the pain came. I dismissed it as just a healing process thingy until it became excruciating and kept me awake all night. The next morning I took off for the dentist from the office on permission. The tooth had no choice but to be removed.



My dentist, the nice lady got me seated in the comfortable dentists chair. somewhere inside me, the dread began to mount again. She's gonna dis-tooth me. Won't it be painful? I had heard from others that there would be anasthetics to dull the pain and that's what chilled me a bit.


She injected my gums with anasthetics and I relaxed as my mouth-flesh went limp. My dentist is a nice lady so I thought she would do it gently on me.

Wrong!!

I almost screamed when she picked something that looked like an ice pick and began to break the base of my tooth. It was so intense that I accidentally bit her finger.

I almost fainted when she picked up something that looked like a plier.
I close my eyes and practically went half dead as she yanked my skull and pried to and fro. I was still waiting for more terrible episodes when I was told it was over. I gasped in relief, my mouth region still half-dead and feeling like Sylvester Stallone's face. It felt so good to over the whole nasty toothy affair. But I felt strange; I now had a gaping maw which I had to adapt to for the next four weeks before I had a replacement. It was like being disabled, I could only eat unpleasantly with one side of my mouth for the next few days.



Word to y'all - take good care of ur frigging dentals! After my experience I understood the full meaning of 'Prevention is better than cure'!




PS. I'll soon be posting my own 'random things about me' as posted by Standtall who 'tagged' me to do my own version. Haven't forgotten!