When a Man Falls In Love With a Goat...SMH!
Chronicled by
Afronuts
@
Monday, September 16, 2013
Is the goat a unique
animal?
Is there something
that makes this renown ruminant stand out?
Apart from the fact that
it is a symbol of stubbornness, (you've heard of the stubbornness of the
he-goat, no matter how much you smack it, it never learns.) stupidity (they
never seem to understand what it means to be in danger until it is too late.)
and ability to crap at random (ever seen a goat drop shit like its hot?),
they are also used as metaphors for elements that won’t make heaven, the
likeness of the devil and his esoteric symbolisms (occultic baphomet and the
likes)
But nowadays, we are
seeing goats standing out in more bizarre circumstances.
From news of men ‘straffing’
goats to even marrying them to people paying millions for them.
I came across a news
item where a Saudi Arabian businessman sold a goat for three million dollars. I
was like…is there something unique that this goat would do to my life if I ate
it? Would I become smarter? Would I shit out the remains of the digested goat
as pieces of gold?
Why did the goat cost
that much? They said it was because it had unique features! *SMH!*
Maybe I should start
looking about for any weird-looking local fowl in my neighborhood to sell to a
Saudi Businessman, those guys have a lot of oil money to waste.
Back to the issue of the
goats, I read a news item where a man was banned from every farm in Britain and
sentenced to six weeks in jail for ‘kpanshing’ a goat.
While the news of
humans getting caught sexing animals is not new, even here in Naija, I’m just
trying to figure out what kind of sick devilish ‘agro’ would make a full human-being
lust after a ruminant? What kind of insane sex appeal does a
grass-eating-stinking-herbivore have that a fellow woman-being doesn’t have?
I tire.
And if you think that’s
downright disgusting, what will you say about Aparecido Castaldo, a retired
stone cutter from Jundiai, Brazil who decided to actually marry a goat?
Imagine being labelled the husband of a goat...eeww! |
Did I hear the person
who never heard the story say ‘Haa!!’?
Oh yes he did. And
guess where he did it? In a Church of Satan!
Why? No Christian
church would ever honor such a disgusting request to be married to an animal. According
to the report, Aparecido fell in love with his pet goat two years ago, and
apparently she has already been accepted as a “stepmother” by the man’s seven
children.
Hmm…so the insanity
is no doubt hereditary – that his kids decided to embrace his move an accept a
goat as their ‘stepmother’!
I can’t even imagine
it!
Although the wedding
between the man and his goat caused a lot of controversy in the community and
attracted accusations from animal rights activists, Castaldo said they don’t intend
to ‘straff’.
See attempted
tomfoolery! There’s no way I’m buying that story.
This sick old man
must have been ‘kpanshing’ that goat till he developed a sick soul-tie and couldn’t
imagine life without it. Thus they got married….
What an abomination!
Goat illustration courtesy:
www.dragoart.com
1 Screamer(s):
This man needs to be sent to Nigeria fordeliverance service.
Like play, like play just as we have been made to accept same sex marriage, we will soon find people justifying bestiality .
God help us.
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