Randoms: Uche of Etisalat, Iyanya's Lie, Fani-Kayode's 'reputation', Moet Abebe's 'Yam' Legs, Olu Maintain's video wash etc

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Its another week and I gotta do another set of randoms...don't blame me, I couldn't resist the urge to do it!

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By now many would be conversant with the popular Etisalat Nigeria customer care call recording known as 'Uche, face your work' which went viral earlier this month.

In the recording,  the receiver (who happened to be the wife of the owner of the phone and who obviously was ignorant about what the job of a 'Customer Service' personnel entailed) warned the customer care agent Uche to face her work and stop trying to steal people’s husband. She also threatened to show up at Etisalat’s office to report Uche to the management of the company.

I Listened to the recording and in all honesty Uche was not at fault, she was simply doing her job but the woman simply read the wrong meaning to it. I was given access to listen to this recording by a friend who works at a Telecoms company and she gave me some inside info as to how often they get all manner of silly calls from nut case subcribers.

Now recently, Etisalat has came out to disclaim the recording and as stated by Daily Post, that it was not a commercial done by them. 

“We are aware of the telephone conversation from the so called Etisalat customer care personnel. We are currently investigating the matter but it is not a commercial from Etisalat. All our commercials are handled by our agency and it will be duely signed before it can be released”. Although, no agency has laid claim to the commercial, speculations abound that the commercial might have come from competitors and distractors who are adapting measures on how to cope with the competitive market.

I seriously don't believe that the recording was not made from etisalat after the pointers my friend gave me. According to her, the customer care line can be recorded and this type of calls were common at the call centres. She even played another recorded call she had obtained from another network which was more outrageous than the 'Uche face your work' call.

And from the nature of the recording, it was no commercial or strategy to hit at the network…well, except for the part where the woman says;

‘…face ‎ your work ooo because MTN don’t call customers like that, face ‎​your work.’

Unless that one sha…. 

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As a popular artiste, its a regular thing to always display and show say you get swag...but when you have to go as far as lying, then your swag don get K-leg.

Many celebrities have always been in the news and mostly on social media displaying elements that show that they are 'making it big' - such as showing off cash around them; Psquare, Skuki and a host of others are guilty of this. No problem. But if its a lie, then there's problem...because a lie is not designed to stay hidden for ever.

And so Iyanya was reported as lying to his fans as reported in the Daily Times: 

It was all over the news last week that a computer gadget Chinese company had signed Iyanya as its ambassador in a multi million dollar deal. In fact, Iyanya had announced it himself when he posed with a Lenovo tablet and wrote: ‘New Product !!! New Ambassador !!! Brand Ambassador !!!! Lenovo !!!! Iyanya !!!! Task Direct 2014 Started #triplemg’.But Iyanya's lies has been blown open, as Lenovo denied any of such deal with the Kukere dude.
Iyanya’s manager when reached on the phone confirmed the deal, claiming they made about N150M – N170M from the deal. ‘It’s true, it cost about N150 to N170 million and the duration is for 24 months’, Ubi Franklin told a NET correspondent over the phone.But NET investigation also revealed that there was no such deal as the company's rep in Nigeria named Mr. Olumide. Lenovo SA also said they are not aware of the deal.Olumide told NET's editors over the phone that he was not aware of any signing with Iyanya.‘I can’t really say on that. I don’t know anything; I don’t know who he is. Honestly I don’t know anything, maybe you should call him and ask him yourself’, Olumide told our correspondent over the telephone. 

If I were Mr. Kukere, I'd do quick damage control before more shit hits the ceiling fan. But it bothers me...why did he lie (if he really did)?

He needs to clear the air oh...mess dey smell.

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(In)famous Former Minister of Aviation, Femi Fani-Kayode is raising hell and accusing the federal government of using his on-going trial to smear his reputation. According to a report:

Former Minister of Aviation, Chief Femi Fani-Kayode, has accused the federal government of using his ongoing trial before the Federal High Court in Lagos as a smear campaign to tarnish his reputation.According to the former minister, who is now a chieftain of the All Progressives Congress (APC), the Federal Government, through their incessant and relentless persecution, has sought to make life uncomfortable for him, strip him of his dignity and diminish his status.Fani-Kayode, who said that the campaign reached a crescendo after he quit the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) for APC, however, insisted that he was ready to take his plea and defend the alleged money laundering charge against him.

I laugh in Spanish.

Which reputation is this man trying to protect?

The reputation that has made him renown for ‘misyarning’ frequently on Facebook and trying to ignite scandals all over the place from long gone old relationships? The man has become famous for just talking anyhow without discretion (which made him look like he’s desperately trying to stay relevant or looking for attention).

Or is there a good reputation of his that I am not aware of? Somebody please inform me oh….

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There’s so much false and nonsense information circulating concerning Naija’s political arena. One of the recent ones was the aftermath of the APC registration which took place last week and was recently extended.

The PDP went all out to say Nigerians have rejected APC because of the extended membership registration since many Nigerians were believed to have failed to show up for registration. In a news report:

The Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) Monday criticised the All Progressives Congress (APC) over the extension of its membership registration, saying it was a sign that Nigerians had rejected the opposition party.The APC, which had accused the PDP of trying to sabotage its membership drive, had on Sunday extended the exercise, initially billed to end yesterday, by two days to enable those who have not registered to do so.But the ruling party derided the APC's action and commended Nigerians for shunning the membership registration, prompting the opposition party to extend the exercise.

But information I got from reliable source was that there were not enough registration slips because the APC got more response than they bargained for, especially from Northern parts of the nation. Thus they ran out of registration forms and had to extend the period for more to get registered.

So wetin PDP dey talk?

And then…unless the info I also got was a propaganda…hmmm

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Okay…some or one self-proclaimed fashionista abi na stylist have gone on to label Soundcity VJ, Moet Abebe’s lower limbs as ‘Yam legs’ because dem dey quite thick. 

Fuse.com.ng reports:

The TV presenter has been under attack from various stylists and fashionistas about her very *erm* thick legs.She couldn’t take it anymore and so like every self-respecting celebutante, she took to social media to let everyone know that their opinions matter very little when it concerns her body. 

Errmm…is that suppose to mean that her legs are ugly? I hope these dim-sighted stylists are not dissing those limbs of hers because for me, Moet’s portability and thickness is cute…and that very much includes her legs. People sha...if they're not analyzing somebody's big nyansh, they are speculating someone's legs.

I don’t know whoever made this an issue that it has become overblown news…this girl has a physique many guys would die for and legs many would trip for (yes I know many who love thick legs). Which one come be the yam there now? Moet in response tweeted about her love for her legs:

But then Fuse.com.ng reported that she was once said to have declared that in a youth magazine that she despised her trotting twosomes: 

Weird thing is, Moet was quoted in Teen Y! as saying ‘I hate my own legs…’“I hate my legs. Honestly, I do…I just don’t like the way my legs are personally right now but umm… that I know is with cardio, you know leg exercises and stuff, I can get it to the way I want it to be. But there’s nothing I can do about my height, do you know what I mean? So, I’m always going to have short legs.”So Mrs Abebe, which one is it? You hate em or Like em?

Hian! Okay…wetin make Moet change her mind if this is true then? I’d really love to know…

But seriously….people, aren’t those legs cute? I no see yam there nah!

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Olu maintain has released another music video.

Uumm..on second thought, he shouldn’t have.

I watched it and felt offended that I had wasted five minutes watching a clichéd copycat of the previous video he shot.

Why shoot a music video when you don’t have anything to shoot?

There’s nothing memorable and wow about the video. All we see is just Olu on a plane taking his bath, flaunting drinks, cigars, cash and frolicking about with skimpily dressed chicks while lip syncing a boring and pointless tune.

Everything looked all so familiar and already done.

The video also lacked believability.

Above: Olu comes down from the plane
Below: The supposed interior of the plane he just embarked from

Above: A scene from the video which would be the real interior of the plane
Below: The fake interior...too obvious.

If you want to fool us that a small plane like the one we saw its exterior was the same one we saw of its insides, then do it convincingly.

Instead we see a small plane on the outside with the inside of a massive luxury Boeing 747. Abi the plane na vehicle like Doctor Who’s time travel phone booth ship, the Tardis?

Dr Who's Tardis (above)
Inside the Tardis (Below)

I doubt that.

The video was probably just (in igbo accent) a waste despite all the glamorizing and video vixens fooling around with Olu. Meanwhile the song was just there…like there was no song at all but mumblings and repetitions; the song be like an extremely sour garri ijebu that has refused to swell…

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 And so I end this set of randoms...have a nice week.