Randoms: Mariah Carey & Misyarn from Radaronline, 'Fanta' Governor Alao-Akala, Beyonce's strange track, Wale's outburst on Complex, Rukky's 'Sesky' Photo

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, December 16, 2013

Hello y'all!

Please forgive me for staying away on a one week hiatus. It was due to a one week event that require my presence at church. Now I'm back, ready to post. I came across interesting news I would have posted last week but I'll just have to let that go since they would be stale by now.

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So on with the randoms for today...

The news of Mariah Carey arriving in Nigeria to perform at a Christmas party and send-off event of Access Bank's retired MD Aigboje Aig-Imoukhede. She took a backstage photo before the performance and one blog called her dress a 'stunning outfit'. Seriously, what's stunning about what she's wearing - a partitioned gown with fishnet effects? That outfit couldn't stun a cockroach. Some Bloggers need to stop sensationalizing things.

See dress...wetin hot for this one?
Oh...is it because she show belle under fishnet?

But then the shocking aspect was the report given by Radaronline, some foreign site that paints Nigeria in bad light with a headline that screamed 'Mariah Carey Performs For Money Men In Nigeria, World’s Center Of Bank Fraud & Human Trafficking'. The site goes on to suggest that Carey should have done a research on Naija before accepting to get paid for the gig; and then goes on to highlight all the 'bad things' ever said about Naija - human trafficking, Email scams (the knuckleheads even called it '411 Scams' instead of '419'...and they are telling Carey to do research when they themselves know nuthin!)

Radaronline's headline...they even labelled the thing as 'Exclusive'!

Then they end the article with these corny references...

Carey isn’t the first performer who has taken a paycheck for appearing in countries known for terror, death and fraud.
In 2011, Beyoncé sang for Moammar Gadhafi’s sons and Jennifer Lopez performed in Turkmenistan.

And so?

What if a country has fraud, death or terror issues? Should it stop celebrities from making their money? With harsh economic times, it makes sense. And they need to stop talking rubbish about Naija and other nations as being known for terror and fraud. We know what the United States were up to in Iraq and many of us know that Osama Bin Laden and the war on terror, was a grandiose scheme to defraud Americans.

Rubbish...stop casting the first stone when you're worse off.

Too bad...Mariah knew where to get the money while una dey run ya mouth.

And that does not leave Access Bank in the clear oh...wetin make dem go hire a whole Mariah Carey for Christmas party? Has somebody stolen bank funds again?

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Some reporters get liver sha...And I don't blame them, that's what they are trained for; just like lawyers, they ask you questions that will put you on the edge. Former Governor of Oyo State, Chief Adebayo Alao-Akala was probably caught unawares when a Punch Newspaper reporter asked him the question:

'Is it part of your own fashion to bleach?' 

The enraged ex-governor was reported to have replied...

'Bleach? That is stupidity; you are asking a very stupid question, how can I bleach? You are very stupid to ask that question. What do you mean by that? What gave you that impression?
(He pulled up his clothe and singlet to show his fair complexion.)
Is this bleaching? Have you seen the cream that I use that makes me bleach or did you know me when I was black? So if you want to write that, put it there that I said you are very stupid to ask me that kind of question. Don’t ask that kind of question again. What you don’t know; you ask. You don’t even know my parents. Is my wife complaining or my children? I don’t know what gave anybody the impression that I bleach. You don’t know me; do you know what it takes to bleach?'

Okay, we've heard the ex-governor...but it would have been nice if he could tell us if his 'Fanta' complexion is natural nah...or if he too was suffering from vertiligo like the late Michael Jackson...or if he accidentally fell inside a bucket of Tura cream as a baby. Ehen...at least we can say eeya...its not his fault. Because seriously speaking, with fingers that like look overcooked sausages and that 'Fanta' complexion, I'm not falling for that lie that he doesn't bleach...or maybe the reporter should have asked his question differently...like - 'Sir do you use exotic creams for you 'beautiful' complexion?'

Maybe he would have proudly replied 'Yes'.

Abi?

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Nowadays, when I hear that some celebrity is glamorously married to another celebrity, I hardly expect it to last. But fortunately, While some have succeeded in breaking the jinx others that looked promising are not always so lucky. People up till now may have been thinking that Beyonce's marriage to Jay Z was meant to last but Beyonce's recent album is said to have a track titled 'Mine' which sings about marriage troubles.

In an axcerpt from the track which features Drake, Beyonce sings:

I’ve been watching for the signs/Took a trip to clear my mind/Now I’m even more lost/And you’re still so fine, oh my oh my/Been having conversations about breakups and separations/I’m not feeling like myself since the baby/Are we gonna even make it? Oooh/Cause if we are, we’re taking this a little too far/Me being wherever I’m at, worried about wherever you are

Its not the first time an artiste bares his or her real life challenges through their music. Miley Cyrus' 'Wrecking Ball' track reflected a recent heartbreak she just went through, DMX and Tupac rapped a number of times about what they were actually going through, Eminem made a number of tracks that where a cry for help from his travails, majority of Micheal Jackson's songs of defiance centred around the things the industry and the powers that be were putting him through...the list goes.

And when you sing about something that's really happening to you, everything about you goes into it. 

Beyonce's new album is said to talk about so much and reveal a lot. Whether it shows that her marriage is deteriorating cannot be clear yet, maybe its just another approach to sell the album and create fan empathy. Conspiracy theorists should get ready...she might be letting out some valuable hidden info within her music.

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Its apparent that even the priviledge of being a celebrity never means one will be rid of a complex. Nigerian-born American rapper, Wale demonstrated this when he blew hot against Complex magazine for not including his album on the 50 best albums of 2013 list.

In a 3 minute phone convo, Wale blasted a Complex Magazine staff saying that the publication had a personal bias against him.

Seriously?

You need to listen to that conversation to know how serious the rapper took the matter. From all the ranting and raving, I can say that he may soon end up in a bad place one day. He sounded all gangsta and threatening; its almost enough to get him issued a restraining order.

According to Complex Magazine: 

Contrary to Wale's claims, Complex does not hold any personal bias towards him or any other artist. Wale's album was considered for our list, along with many other albums, but it did not make the cut. Furthermore, Wale has made a number of Complex lists this year. His song "LoveHate Thing" was No. 24 on our list of The Best Songs of 2013 (So Far). We also list his mixtape, The Mixtape About Nothing, No. 20 on our list of The 50 Best Rapper Mixtapes. And finally, earlier this year, we had him on our list of The 20 Best Rappers in Their 20s

Wale later posted an instagram video in an attempt to make fun of the whole situation of his threats. Maybe someone spoke some sense into him and he realized his error. Thus he embarked on a weak attempt at damage control. 

For any artiste who has potential to blow hot over a simple rejection, its only a matter of time before we start seeing them on a downward spiral. Not everybody go like wetin you dey sing nah...even me sef no dig the guy. 

You definitely can't try that in Naija...where people sabi take your BS and return it back to sender.

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So here's a picture of Rukky Sanda which somebody calls a 'sexy pic'. Okay...I won't argue that but man...the photo is creepy on some levels...she looks like a plastic doll, mannequin...or a body that was recently embalmed.

Please if you be Rukky Fan, no vex oh...I just have an outrageous and weird sense of imagination! I'm struggling to see the sexy in the pic...is it because she yellow like 'mammy water'? Is it because she's got a face that has undergone plastic surgery? Or because she has contact lenses on or 'albino' eyes? Is it because her dress exposes some laps or showcases some cleavage? 

Okay I'm rambling too much...Abeg don't mind my own oh. I know she is somebody's perfect spec...like one of our clients that keeps insisting we use 'yellow gals' for his press Ads.