Signs of The Times 13 [Photos - Church Banners]

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, September 22, 2014

I know from all scriptural indications that the Almighty God has a divine sense of humor. Psalm 2:4 says 'He that sitteth in the Heavens shall laugh...'. Another chapter in the same book (Psalm 37:13) says 'The Lord shall laugh at him for He seeth his day is coming'. 

I then wonder whether the Almighty would find it funny the way some churches and ministries address his work. There are so many out there (both truly called and fakes) who are accidentally turning the seriousness of the ministry into a joke with their ridiculous signboards and banners. I don't know which ones are truly called and which ones are fake (God knows those who are His) but from the display of some of these signs, you can have an inkling on which is which.

This signboard got my head twisted as I struggled to understand what it meant...
What is a First Superet Branch?

Na who dem they call 'Crazy Mother'? Mary?
Na church be this? SMH...

Hmmm...if I swallow my problems, I wonder how my shit would look like...

Everybody coming here must have thought this is the only place you can drink
and club to make Heaven. God dey Heaven dey laugh all of una

Haba! God dey owe you money?

Another poster harassing the Almighty for money...

I don't understand this one at all oh...na creativity be this? Abi na confusion?
They even made it a N20 note...why N20? N1000 no dey there?

Hahaha...this one na herbalist abeg...

Where is the politician wey no dey use 'odechi'?
Wetin concern Jesus with political ambition?

See how they are using Jesus to do propaganda....

Next they will claim He is a spare parts dealer and not a carpenter...SMH

Ahn ahn...why did they have to put satan on the poster? Is he also ministering?
And wetin be the thing wey him swallow sef?

How will one not think this is a crusade for deliverance from body odour?

At least two things are wrong with this flier...seen 'em?

All this vomiting with bad grammar sef....na like so we go dey dey?

This na prayer abi na yeye? Wetin concern
front teeth with deliverance?

Haa...na church dem wan do here abi na sacrifice?

Hmmm....wetin we go talk?

It is well!

Have a lovely week!

Signs of the Times 12 [Photos]

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Monday, September 08, 2014

We are in a period when Nigeria is going through dark moments with the Ebola palava, Naija Political gymnastics and Boko Haram spreading its onslaught like an aboki epidemic amongst other matters arising in the news. And so many of the newspapers are carrying more bad news than good. It can be depressing checking out headlines every morning so lets give ourselves some comic relief by checking out another instalment of signs of the times...hahaha! Man...I had to go through all that info just to achieve an intro...lol.

So let's check out our set of photos for today...

Some Nigerians are daring people sha...they must have
thought whoever put up this sign was all mouth and no action

This one is even worse...even the curse on the signboard
could not deter the craze people wey dump the trash

Naija and copy copy...Don jazzy's legacy don enter optician's portfolio

....And some cliche programme on an NTA channel.

Is this an attempt to funkify a word or somebody just no sabi spell?

Really? So Jollof rice don become like indomie noodles?

See how this Aba boys are disgracing us...

Lord...which kain Garri be this? And whenever did a satchet of
garri need drinking instructions?
Oh wait...it says it's 'sweetable'....?

See how 'H' factor dey disgrace person

The owner of this car has gained both a plus and a minus.
Plus - he gets a free condom, minus - he gets a new name -'asshole'

I don't think this shirt can beat the market of poorly produced shirts
that say shit like 'My money grows like grass'

Somebody had too much time and money on their hands.

This is not a Naija picture but I just couldn't resist putting it here...
So some people no get brain, amazing...

Smart way to pass an advertising message round;
also a smart way to get arrested for defacing the naira.

Hmm...so this barbering saloon is so dedicated to Jesus that
'jaguda' hairstyles are not 'allow'....what the heck is a jaguda hairstyle?

Wow...Illiterates are now operating school businesses...

....And opening franchises of home teaching?

So what does a rude notice sound like?

Just reading the signboard alone should cure you instantly

See discrimination oh...Na only Igbo woman sabi cook?

Okay....I'm done for today. Sorry i couldn't get so much but i try nah shey?

Signs of The Times 11 [Photos]

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Tuesday, June 03, 2014

By now, anyone who follows my series on 'Signs of the Times' will understand that this is a gallery showcase of funny signboards, inscriptions, placards, labels, names and any design be it in print or digital that's just either accidentally or deliberately outrageous and funny. Sometimes, its not the inscription that's funny but the place where its written on. Majority of this collection is from Nigeria. Others would come from other African nations. I usually don't feature those from the western world but in some cases I make exceptions. 

This is the 11th installment in the series. Check them out and please drop your own comment! 

This is a police station? What do they arrest and detain here?
Goats and chickens or humans?

 

No matter how much sell 'oyinbo' groceries to Nigerians,
they will demand to eat their awesome bush menu.
Yes...our bush menu is awesome, oyinbo can never have 'iru' (locust beans)

Men have suffered oh! As if fake nails, hair, eyelashes, skin color etc is
not enough, there is now physically enhanced fake virginity?

They probably meant 'Humus'...costly error. Imagine having a fag for breakfast...eeww

I'd give a thousand bucks to know what's going on in her mind.

You can add sophistication to native naija, but you can't take the bush out of them.
Na Oshoms get Shoprite? Haba!

A blackberry perfume with versace design pattern....
wow, this was definitely designed to sell to stupid people

See how they reduced a whole international designer
into a sweet ontop okrika boxers

The painter must have had too much paraga the night he painted those words

This is either the most embarrassing or humiliating way  to apologize

Abge, which kain political apppointment be this?

Anything wey dey trend must enter entertainment...even if na bad news

Which kind of mindset would make people this gullible?

By their placards you shall know their digital exposure.
Atiku and Tinubu think the hashtag is the naira note symbol

If only this miracle could happen to my comatose blackberry...

I keep wondering...was her name for real or
was she playing a joke on the officials?

This is proof that idiots exist among us...

Wow...the two football clubs have a bread franchise in Naija?
Abi someone dey fool us?

Your typical Naija warning sign accompanied by a curse.

I'd love to know which school this was for....

I hope it wasn't a yoruba movie subtitler that wrote this...

Eh? What is 'Cheaps'? Some revolutional local menu?
Or did they 'chips'?

I don't know what to say about this but it just cracked me up
that I had to put it here! Insane Beyonce fan.

And that's all for now folks. which one cracked up up the most?