WACO DICO 1

One thing I've come to love and appreciate about comedy is the fact that a lot of the funny jibes thrown at the audience has some wisdom or salient truth in it. The same goes for these spoof dictionary descriptions I got via email. I was so intrigued by them that I went a-searching online for more to beef up the collection. take a look for yourself and feel the outrageous wisdom of these wisecracks.


CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!




CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.


DENTIST:
A magician who puts metal into your mouth, and pulls coins out of your pocket.


DISNEYLAND:
People-trap operated by a mouse.


ACHIEVEMENT:
The end of doing and the beginning of bragging.


ADOLESCENT:
A teen who acts like a baby if you don't treat them like an adult.


ADVICE:
What we ask for that we already know the answer to but wish we didn't.


ALIMONY:
A mistake by two people, paid for by one.


AMBASSADOR:
An honest man sent to lie abroad for the good of his country.


ANONYMOUS:
The worlds most popular author.


ARCHAEOLOGIST:
Man whose career lies in ruins.


DIVORCE:
Future tense of a bad marriage


LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either


COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece


TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power!


DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes before marriage


CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on


MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master






















ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before


CLASSIC:
A book which people praise, but never read


SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!


OFFICE:
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life


ETC:
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do


COMMITTEE:
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together


EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their Mistakes


ATOM BOMB:
An invention to bring an end to all inventions


YAWN:
The only time when some married men ever get to open their mouth




















CRIMINAL:
A guy no different from the other, unless he gets caught


DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip


IMPOTENCE:
Nature's way of saying "No hard feelings"


INSANITY:
Driving forty minutes to a health club, then waiting thirty minutes to get on a treadmill for twenty minutes.

11 Screamer(s):

Dee! said...

OMG! This is a very FUNNY list! OMG! I'm trying very hard not to laugh myself silly...

Jaycee said...

DISNEYLAND:
People-trap operated by a mouse
(So TRUE)

ANONYMOUS:
The worlds most popular author.

MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master

Lol at marriage. No wonder a lot of men out there are scared. Eyahh.

I love your cartoons/illustrations.

Myne Whitman said...

This is very funny, some actually had me laughing out loud. LWKMD!

doll said...

LWKMD

hahaha, oh my that was funny! Thanks for sharing. Hope all is well with you and yours.

LG said...

lolllllllllllll hv to copy dis, haba!!!

rayo said...

crazy funny. rotf

This is too funny for words! The last one made me laugh so loud for it is true. I see this in the gym almost everyday and get confused! lol.

In fact the opening picture had me in stitches!

Thank you so much for this! kai!

Olufunke said...

LWKMD!

too funny, Make I do copy-paste!

histreasure said...

lol..really, and i'm in the office..
they sound so true, it's amazing -who thinks up these things?

Afronuts said...

@Dee…hope you din’t fall off your chair!

@Jaycee…Thanks! I’ll pass the word to Kimson!

@Myne…lol!…I’ve never imagined you laffing out loud!

@Doll…HTHAYL?

@Solomon Syd…All is fine and good sista!

@LG…lol! original copycat!

@Rayo…tee hee!

@Remi…For real? Boy I should upload more funny pictures!

@Olufunke… HTHAYL??

@Histreasure…beats me! I guess its people who really take time to think!