Can a Heartbreak Kill? - The Freddy E Questions

I remember way back when I first asked a girl out in high school. It took me weeks to get myself together and summon the courage to walk up to her and talk to her. You know in those days 'toasting' was what we called it when you wanted to ask a girl out; and the lines in those days can be kind of lame. Most of what gets you into a relationship then was either your daredevil or bad boy nature, not much of lines. Lines where a necessary cliche. you use them with courage, you get lucky; you don't, you get an 'isho' (a slang then for rejection).

I had walked up to her class that evening (school had closed and the classes were almost empty). She was the only one in the class, probably reading a book. A friend of mine had told her somebody wanted to see her so she waited, anxious to know who it was.

Yewande (I still remember the name clearly) watched me as I walked into the class. I greeted her, she responded back. I introduced myself and told her that I had been admiring her for a long time and would like to know her more.

She looked at me from head to toe, taking in my carefully ironed school uniform shirt, shorts and kerosine-polished rubber sandals and gave it to me smoothly. She told me thank you that she was not interested and would never ever be interested in somebody like me. Her sarcasm hit me as if someone had thrown a bucket of cold water harshly against me. I had suffered a lingering crush over this girl for weeks and had been mentally rehearshing and dreaming of ways I could be her guy. Now I'd summoned the guts and gotten gutted by her cold rejection.

The days that followed were harrowing for me. 

I stayed clear of her and her friends because I knew she would gist them of what happened. If I saw them along my way, I would change route and pass another direction. But I wouldn't escape it for long.

I sat in class on one of those days when we had free periods in a chat with one of my friends and still smarting badly each time the thought of the rejection crossed my mind when one of the bad boys of our class stepped up to the chalkboard and inscribed on it:

'Afro weds Yewande'  

I felt like the ground should open up and swallow me. I had hoped it wouldn't become public but for this guy to put it on the board meant people knew. This was something I wanted to keep secret but with the chalkboard incident there was no way it would stay public; people began to ask questions and before you knew it, it became widespread news that Afro toasted beautiful Yewande and got a hot 'isho'.

I suffered.

Everywhere I went on the school grounds it seemed so many had heard my story. Its amazing how silly things make news in high school. I was so embarrassed, I descended into a psychological pit of self-loathing and self pity; I hated everyone, even the ones who were supposed to be my friends made serious jest of me. I became a recluse; I despised school and longed for vacation away from the boarding house.
I just didn't have the emotional strenght to handle it all. It was my first move at a girl and my first rejection.

But I never ever contemplated suicide because of this.

Several rejects and dumps from relationships later...I still never contemplated suicide. And thank God I never did because I changed later; first for the worst then for the better, but that's for another story.

I'm writing this concerning the sad news that hit the internet this week over the suicide of rapper and Youtube sensation - Freddy E.

Freddy E

I'm not a fan of his but the circumstance behind his suicide was what got me irked - that he shot himself because his girlfriend dumped him!

It's disturbing because that's really the silliest reason to end your life. The girl na god?
It got me curious and I decided to find out who this Freddy E guy really is and what would drive him nuts enough to take his own life.

After checking him out on his Youtube channel, I was irked.

This guy is talented! And he's got gazillion reasons to keep living! Not only is he good at the Spoken word but also one hell of a comic. His Youtube channel JERKTV has 

If he really killed himself, how come nobody saw it coming? Was he so secretive with his relationships and other stuff?

And then some questions surrounding his death are begging to be answered; questions from me of course. Take for example the news surrounding his death. Majority are assuming it was suicide but some are still reporting it as 'Suspected' or 'Apparent' suicide.

Old pic touted as recent one
Then, there's a picture of Freddy holding a gun to his head being tweeted all over twitter as the last photo he took before he pulled the trigger which is untrue. The photo was actually an old photo from one of his video clips! The actual last pic he posted was of him and his friends taking drink shots at a bar or club.
He was reported by to have sent a text to Honey Cocaine, (the girl he apparently died for). The text said 'I feel everyone is out to get me'.

Details surrounding his death are not clear. All we hear are just the fact that he has committed suicide. This makes the whole thing sound fishy.

Could it be that Freddy E was 'silenced'?

Freddy with one of the fan undies and fan mail

Because if you look at it, this guy had a huge following on his Youtube channel, he had fans all over the place, a lady even tattoed his name on her butt and instagrammed it; others mailed their underwear to the guy (these female fans are insane!). His twitter page has over 100,000 followers. Tthere was a lot going for him and suddenly, he ends his life just like that? 

Sounds a bit awkward.

It reminds me of a lot of artistes who have died mysteriously in the past. Did Freddy just make that list?

Notice anything awkward in this posted info?

The suicidal tweet. Some things don't seem to add up well here.

Because I've noticed from his channel that he's made some 'eye-opening' conspiracy videos that I know may not go down well with some people in some places; for example, his video that showcased the KONY2012 campaign as questionable and a rip off aimed at conning the public, or the deep spoken word video titled 'Ignorance' which questions the status quo and ignorance of the public

Whatever the case, I'm still doubtful of the fact that this guy actually killed himself.

May he rest in peace.

6 Screamer(s):

Debby 'Baro said...

Oh! This is a rather sad one. I'm happy for you sha, that you did not have to do anything funny to yourself when that girl 'fashied' you. But you self, what were you liking in a girl at that your small age?*laughter, and more laughter* I beg i can't fit shout. Lol!

jhazmyn said...

I didn't know him, but being that I trust your judgement and you say he's mighty talented, its sure disheartening that his life ended this way.

Hmm, whatever the case, suicide of murder, its sure a sad way to go

sykik said...

God have mercy. I also can't comprehend it. I guess he probabaly was living for just one person (Honey Cocaine) and couldn't stand her rejection or the thought of her moving on to someone else.

BTW is suicide not a sin?

T.Notes said...

Thanks for the education mate.

Anonymous said...

He was so cute!!! And its just sad that he had to go like he did he was talented and seemed very kind hearted i loved him and when ever i was felling down i would. Watch his videos to make me smile..
R.I.P FREDDY E love you always and forver<3

I see that he loved his girlfriend deeply that he would do anything for her, but was there really a reason to take his own life over that , he was a talented and gifted person there was no reason for all of that, we all loved him dearly fans, friends, and most of all family, we all beleived in him and saw a better future for him to carry on with the importance of life,but may god rest his soul and peace be with you..forever your fan cortajah Dixon😢✋💐