Nigeria has the 5th Sexiest Accent Worldwide





For those of you Nigerians who like to fake your accents and form 'phonetics', you may actually be wasting your time. CNN went a-searching for the world's sexiest accents and you'll be surprised to discover that the Nigerian accent ranks number 5 amongst the top 12 sexiest accents that speak the English language!

It’s estimated that there are nearly 7,000 languages on earth. That’s nearly 7,000 different accents that the English language has to be processed through. The English language from time has been a prostituting language in that it has a history of coming into existence as a result of borrowing from other languages to form its own body as a whole.

So here's a summary of the countdown of the top 12: 





12. Argentine - cultivated by a mixture Spanish, Italian and German which gives it a 'pouty tone' was ranked 12th and was described as sounding like 'a tightly tuned guitar of G-strings strummed by a lamb shank' (Whatever that is!)

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11. Thai - which is said to be monosyllabic in nature and fond of playing extra beat and emphasis on foreign words was ranked 11th and described as sounding like an 'R-rated Karaoke' (WTH?)

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10. Trinidadian - which is the brainchild of a melodic combination of Pan-African, French, Spanish, Creole, and Hindi dialects (wow!) came in at 10th and is said to sound like 'a rubber life raft bobbing on a sea of steel drums' (Really? That's what a Nikki Minaj sounds like?)

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9. Brazilian Portuguese - which beats its European counterpart due to a more colorful, puerile and flirty nature, picked up the 9th position and was described as 'The near, then far, then near again hum of a low-wattage vacuum cleaner that runs on dance sweat' (Na wah oh! Which kain description be this?)

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8. U.S Southern - notorious for its drawls and hurriedness is 8th on the list is described as sounding like  'Molasses taking a smoking break' (Huh? Forgive my sudden bushness but wetin be 'Molasses'?)

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7. Oxford British - which is what makes you enjoy listening to James Bond speak clocks 7th position and is described as sounding like 'a crisply ironed shirt playing a harp' (LMAO! That's really what it sounds like!)

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6. Irish - which is more valued in men than women and renown for its ability to switch from vulnerable to threatening within a sentence came 6th and is described as sounding like 'a marauding pixie' (Hahahaha! Sounds like an dwarfed area boy!)

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5. Nigerian!
- Known for the deep rich 'oh's' and 'eh's' and the bending of the English language without breaking it and arousing tremors in places other languages can't is placed at 5th position and is described as sounding like 'the THX intro with teeth' (Yeepaa! Sorry if you've never heard of the THX intro; it means you don't watch movies from beginings)

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4. Czech - which is said to be bohemian, smoky, full-bodied and goes well with most meats (Huh?) is said to sound like 'Count Dracula, Secret Agent' (Shuu! Lafta no go kill me die!)

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3. Spanish - known to be sensual and beckoning is placed 3rd and said to sound like 'an outboard motor on Lake Paella' (I don't really know what to make of this one.)

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2. French
- They come in at 2nd position and are said to naturally sound naughty and even sound good when they pout. Its no wonder they are described as sounding like 'a 30 year old teenager' (Hahahaha! Dem no dey grow up?)

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1. Italian - came 1st as the accent that grabs ears as if its in the act of coitus with your eardrums; predatory and possessive. Its described as sounding like 'a Ferrari Saxophone' (LWKMD!! A whaaat??)

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And there you have it. To all you original people who are not ashamed of the Naija accent, keep rocking it, it's your pride; and to all you fakers denying the Naija accent, shame on you! On the CNN site, they even mentioned that it might be the reason Naija guys easily scam foreigners (what a bad thing to use a 'gift' for!).

You can read the full article from CNN here.

Have an awesome friday!


Images Courtesy:
www.Cartoonstock.com

www.thekevinchen.wordpress.com

www.toonpool.com
www.dreamstime.com
www.graphicriver.net
www.drawgoodstuff.blogspot.com
www.cartoonaday.com
www.outof9ja.com 
www.shannanigan.com
www.jamaicandancehallmusic.com
www.owensvalleyhistory.com
www.pixabay.com
www.masterfile.com

6 Screamer(s):

Myne Whitman said...

I got plenty of laughs reading this. Thanks for sharing, and those great cartoon pictures you used, LOL....

Avictomama said...

Its like CNN forgot that the nigerian accent is also broken down into tribal accents. The yoruba accent (where the mouth must be opened out of proportion), the igbo accent (that rolls on the tongue), the hausa accent (where 'p' is pronounced 'fi') and the calabar accent (you know the description). So which one of them could CNN be referring to. Also, whats the meaning of THX (I dont even watch movies at all...)

simply mee said...

ahahaha,,really???....am surprised o.

'Lara said...

A lot of Nigerians waste their time trying to sound more british than the owners of the Language self.

I love the italian accent, OMG I drool when I hear an italian speak.

Avictomama pls dont spoil it for us oo.. ahann what now? You think its not the same in Italy, or all part of the world. Obviously they are referring to the mainstream of Naiaja.. Besides each country will have different intonation nah its like America, NewYork, Texas etc it all different. In the UK sef, there are many accents e.g Leeds, Cockney, North London, South London etc so what is British Accent in that case?? Maybe its Oxford...abegi...

But I got ur point sha..lol.

Anyhoo, on a lighter note, THANK YOU i love our niaja accent jare we rock... xxx lol. In fact am now a convert, gone is the UK accent oo..lol. I couldn't wait to read ours... good report this should show some fakers there is no need.

Pls wetin be THX ke oo

xxxx

Dobby said...

I actually expected the french accent to come first. lolz! nice one though.