The Mutation of the Underwear

Chronicled by Afronuts @ Tuesday, April 30, 2013

I’m getting tired of having to talk about undergarments…seriously!

But I have to because people don’t seem to realize that we are fast moving into an age where the ritualistic act of wearing undergarments will soon totally disappear and many will eventually be wearing nothing (well that seems to have started already from a post I put up some time ago). We have been lamenting the alarming trend of clothes (especially that of women) that seem to be fast changing from the simple mission of covering ones ‘valuables’ to exposing them, thus accidentally turning all that come into visual contact with them into voyeuristic perverts.

I've always questioned the existence of thongs or G-strings as undergarments and I've gotten rationales that seem to make sense though I still suspect it is also a sinful tool for causing emotional and hormonal havoc to the opposite sex. Well, we just had to live with it; wifey even had some and I must confess that I liked them on her.

I had obviously forgotten that we’re in the last days where things just get worse and worse like in the days of Noah.

I happened to be on Verastic’s blog reading an article that Vera had put up when I saw the thumbnail of another article she had written. It was about a new kind of underwear for men, The weird thing looked like a half-thong or half-brief. They called it the ‘Lateral Thong’.

The Lateral Thong

I can never guess the reason for this abominable conception. I can never even dream of wearing this weird thing. Wifey would think I was nuts and also question my sexual orientation if I showed up in it; I’m sure it was designed by some gay dude. I know women wear G-strings and other kinds of underwear for rationalized reasons by I can’t seem to find any reason why a dude would wear this.  I’m fine with my boxer shorts, thank you!

Reading through Vera’s blog, she made mention of the ‘C-string’ for women being way better than this and there was a link to it.

A ‘C-string’? Which one be that again?

I clicked the link to check it out and my eyes almost popped out of their sockets. For those of you who don’t know, a ‘C-string’ is like a G-string minus the ropes, like in the picture below:

The C-String

When I googled it to be sure of what Vera was saying and my screen became a skin display arena as different kinds of photos of ‘places where the sun don’t shine’ under the cup-covering of C-strings filled the screen; I had to close it before someone saw it and thought I was engaging in a perverted act of checking out other people’s nether regions!

If you even saw this underwear from afar (especially if it was black in color), the person would look like she wasn't wearing anything below!

Vera had mentioned it on her blog in regards to women wearing it. To my horror, I discovered on the google image page that there was a version for men! If you haven't seen it before click here to view how it looks. It's a bit too risque to put on my site.

Was that really necessary?

Days later, I was discussing with Wifey over a gist about underwear issues and she laughed and said she had something to show me amongst a set of female undies she was helping a friend to sell. Then she brought out this undergarment that I had to actually ask her several times over again, ‘You sure say this one na ‘pata’?’ – because I couldn’t believe people actually wore such.

This one na pant?

It looked like a G-string in reverse – instead of having a rope, it had a string of beads that went over and underneath your crotch!

I found it hard to comprehend that this was an underwear, it looked like something designed for a woman to masturbate while she walked…uurrggh!

And while my mouth was still ajar in perplexity and my mind struggled to figure how a person would feel comfortable in that, she brought another one which was not new to me – panties with extra butt-pads for women that have no ‘Nyansh’. Though it wasn’t new to me, I had never actually seen a real one (don’t need to, wifey has the REAL thing) except the one I saw on the internet which had a variety of sizes.

Undie with butt-pads (Back view)

Undie with butt-pads (Front view)

Men are seriously being deceived…especially if you are the one who likes your spec of woman to be heavily endowed on her backside (a good reason not to base a relationship majorly on looks).

I remember I put up an illustration in another post way some time ago in which someone had created of the progression of women’s underwear through the ages in which they keep shrinking until they practically disappear.  

I’m beginning to think that prediction is becoming a reality!

Not only are undies disappearing, they are also mutating into weird hybrids.

Additional Images courtesy

www.washingtonpost.com

www.searchingforstyle.com 

www.vajazzling.com